M is for Mahu

With everything in the news lately about the devastating fires in Hawaii on the island of Maui, I wanted to pick a Hawaiian themed book to review for this month and by chance, stumbled across this wonderful picture book which was a Stonewall Honor Book in 2022.

Long ago, before Kakuhihewa ruled Oahu, four Tahitians journeyed across the ocean from their home in Moaulanuiakea to Hawaii.

So begins Kapaemahu written by Hinaleimoana Wong-Kalu, Dean Hamer, and Joe Wilson, illustrated by Daniel Sousa, and published by Kokila (an imprint of Penguin Random House). The book is based on an animated short film also titled Kapaemahu created by the same team. The film was shortlisted for an Oscar at the 2021 Academy Awards, and has won critical acclaim and many awards worldwide.

The story continues sharing rich details about these four visitors who came to live in Waikiki. They were mahu. Mahu are dual-spirit people who encompass male and female. The leader of these mahu was named Kapaemahu. All four mahu possessed great healing powers and helped the Hawaiian people. To show their gratitude, the people erected a monument in the mahus’ honor.

Four large boulders were placed on the beach and during a ceremony, the mahu transferred their healing powers to the stones and then vanished. The stones continued as a sacred place for the people of Oahu for a long time. During the period when white settlers came to colonize the Hawaiian islands, the stones were forgotten and buried under new construction. Fortunately, the stones have been recovered and given a place of honor once again on Waikiki Beach.

This beautiful cultural story of Hawaii is shared by Wong-Kalu in both English and in Olelo Niihau (the only form of Hawaiian that has been continuously spoken since before the arrival of foreigners). Hawaiian, when spoken aloud, is a lilting and beautiful language. Sousa’s illustrations, rich with colors, are done in a style that evokes Polynesian sculpture and art.

Backmatter includes the history of the healer stones, information about Olelo Niiahu, author’s notes, and a glossary. Many of the islands of the South Pacific culturally embrace dual-spirit people. No one thinks twice about the concept of nonbinary. Unfortunately, Hawaii has gone through a period of gender minority discrimination, even suppressing the connection of the mahu with these ancient healing stones. Stories like this one can help show the link of gender diversity to our history and make the future more inclusive.

“Filled with cultural details and beautifully illustrated in vibrant tropical colors, the book pays homage to Indigenous Hawaiian healing traditions and affirms two-spirit people.” (Kirkus reviews)

Wishing all the peoples of Hawaii healing as they recover from the Maui fires.

Simply Skye

As a postscript to International Nonbinary Peoples Day, this month I am reviewing a brand-new rainbow picture book. Simply Skye is written by Pamela Morgan, illustrated by Heather Bell, and published by Amicus Ink.

“Skye wasn’t made to be a boy or a girl.” This is how main character, Avi, introduces us to the doll, Skye. Avi describes various reasons why Skye isn’t a girl and isn’t a boy. Skye and Avi participate in different types of play with Avi’s sister, Angela, and Avi’s brother, Andrew. Avi likes dressing up for tea parties and playing pirates with Skye, but knows neither activity defines who both Avi and Skye are. This is cause for concern. Will the family accept Skye as neither boy nor girl? Will they accept Avi? 

Pamela Morgan, herself the parent of a nonbinary child, handles this subject with sensitivity and care. While the family begins the story thinking in terms of binary gender, they come to understand that Avi and Skye do not fit in this construct. Mommy, Daddy, Angela, and Andrew all let Avi know it is okay to be whoever Avi is. Avi will be accepted and loved.

Heather Bell’s illustrations capture a softness appropriate for the topic, but also the whimsy of childhood play. Avi’s family is drawn as mixed race, with Avi’s (and Skye’s) race presented as an undefined shade. I love this – it really adds to the universality of the topic. Gender issues affect families from all races, backgrounds, and ethnicities. I think my favorite illustration is the final one. Avi is wearing a yellow t-shirt with the nonbinary flag emblazoned on it. Skye is also wearing a yellow shirt. Even though Skye’s back is to the reader, you can assume Skye’s t-shirt matches Avi’s. They are “Simply Avi. Simply Skye.”

My own Thing 1 did not come out as nonbinary until they were in their 20’s. Had they understood their gender dysphoria more as a young child, this is the book I would’ve wanted to have in our house – to let them know they could be whoever they wanted to be and we would always love them. Thanks to Pamela and Heather for creating this wonderful gem of a picture book.

S is for Soccer, Sometimes

This month is the start of the FIFA Women’s World Cup. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m not a fan of soccer. I played one disastrous season when I was 10 and said, “Never again.” Thankfully, Thing 1 and Thing 2 only played a couple of seasons of AYSO. With one exception, I would rather rearrange my sock drawer than watch soccer on TV. That exception is the USWNT – the U.S. Women’s National Soccer Team.

The strength, fortitude, ability, and teamwork of these women always blows me away. I also truly love that no one seems to care if any of the players are queer or straight. From rookies like Alyssa Thompson to veteran Megan Rapinoe (with her trademark pink hair), I can’t wait to see how our team does this year. 

In honor of the World Cup, I am reviewing Courage in Her Cleats: The Story of Soccer Star Abby Wambach written by Kim Chaffee, illustrated by Alexandra Badiu, and published by Page Street Kids, 2023.

Abby Wambach was an incredible soccer player who retired in 2015. As stated in the book’s backmatter, during her career on the U.S. Women’s National Team, Abby scored 184 international goals; more than any other U.S. soccer player, male or female. She’s won Olympic gold medals, the FIFA World Cup, and was inducted into the National Soccer Hall of Fame. Abby is also lesbian and happily married to her wife, author Glennon Doyle.

Kim Chaffee’s text highlights Abby’s soccer journey from determined child to tough teenager to triumphant professional. Abby’s motto was always “be loud and clear”, and she used that motto to help lead the Women’s National Team. Chaffee includes several incidents during Abby’s life and career when things didn’t go her way – missed goals, lost games, and injuries. These were tough, “but Abby was tougher.”

Alexandra Badiu’s whimsical illustrations are vibrant and impart the energy and movement of the soccer players with showers of color and shooting stars.

“Though the book focuses solely on Abby’s soccer career—rather than her activism, published books, or other interests—it’s nevertheless a strong work, featuring lively onomatopoeia and threaded with a joyful spirit of perseverance.” (Kirkus reviews)

Wishing the entire USWNT the best of luck in the World Cup and hopefully, we will all be throwing up our hands, yelling, “GOAL!!!!!!!!” a whole heck of a lot. My sock drawer will just have to wait.

L is for Love

First off, thank you, my followers, for your patience as my broken arm heals. I’ve regained full mobility in my elbow and wrist which is a great improvement. However, there is nerve damage in my left hand, and right now, I cannot feel anything in my index finger and part of my palm. As I’m left-handed, this makes writing and typing a bit more challenging. As you can imagine, this has put me a bit behind regarding posts. So, here is the blog post I had planned to share back in March.

On February 27, I became the luckiest person in the world. My wonderful, amazing, nonbinary kiddo, Thing 1, got married. They found a true match for themself, and Doug and I couldn’t be happier. Every time I get to say “daughter-in-law”, my heart jumps and I let off a squeal of delight. As with my two kids, I will not be using my DIL’s actual name, but refer to her as “Sally” – continuing with my Cat in the Hat motif. The wedding was held in Canada (where Sally lives). Thing 1 plans to emigrate to Canada and the two of them will live there. Doug and I attended the wedding via Zoom (plane tickets were unbelievably expensive). It was a small ceremony with a Canadian Marriage Commissioner and a couple of witnesses. Watching my firstborn pledge themself to their true love was so beautiful. I was both grinning and crying at the same time – yes, you can do that. I’m so proud of the adult Thing 1 has become, and seeing them take this next step in their life was breathtaking. Our family has grown in a wonderful way, and Thing 1 and Sally are starting their own unique family together.

Sally & Thing 1 on their wedding day

In keeping with these feelings of love and family, I want to share a new picture book I found. Love Without Bounds: An IntersectionAllies Book about Families by Drs. Chelsea Johnson, LaToya Council, and Carolyn Choi and illustrated by Ashley Seil Smith is published by Dottir Press.

As the Letter to Readers at the beginning says, this book “celebrates the people we love and who love us.” The authors use a bouncy, rhyming text to present all types of families – big, small, straight, gay, black, brown, white, etc. The story includes families with adoption, families separated by military deployment or incarceration, interracial families, interfaith families, divorced families, and the families we choose when our given families can’t give us what we need. 

“So, what does family really mean?
They’re the people who love us and make us feel seen.

The folks who give us time and care
by sharing with us and just being there.

A shoulder to lean on, a space to be free –
whoever gives us that is our family.”

Smith’s collage-style illustrations present a smorgasbord of colors to go with all these different, beautiful families shown. I particularly love how the drawings are done in a minimalistic style. All colors, ethnicities, races, and abilities are presented, adding to the universality of the words “love” and “family”.

A discussion guide and bibliography at the back of the book makes a great jumping off point for continued learning between child and reader. 

A terrific addition to any family library. I will be sure to give a copy to Thing 1 and Sally when they have children. As we approach Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, and Pride Month, I wish you, and whatever form your family takes, nothing but love.

N is for Not-A-Resolution

I have never liked the whole New Year’s Resolution business. On January 1st, you make this sweeping resolution to change your life – lose 50 pounds, exercise every day, organize your life, etc. You, maybe, last a couple of weeks and then, you’re right back to your old patterns. Instead of these huge goals, I prefer to be SMART about my goals. 

I use SMART goals for so many aspects of my life, even for writing this blog.

Specific: My blog topic for this month will be …
Measurable: I know my goal is completed when I publish my blog post
Attainable: I can realistically publish one blog post per month
Relevant: I make sure that my blog topic aligns with my values and objectives for this blog (picture books and LGBTQ+ community)
Time-Bound: I set a deadline of publishing my blog by the 15th of the month

Now, do I successfully complete each goal I make? No, of course not. Some months, my blog doesn’t get published “on time”. But, I know I have a much better chance of completing my goal using this technique.

So, I ask you, my blog reader, what are your SMART goals this year, month, week, etc.? I highly encourage you to become more knowledgeable and more active in the LGBTQ+ community. Our Queer friends and family need us now more than ever. While strides have been made, politically, we are struggling. More schools and states are passing anti-transgender laws, making it harder for our children to fully participate as their true selves. Parents are being prevented from helping their own children, and doctors risk their medical license for providing gender affirming treatments. We must be an active positive force for the Rainbow Community.

Use the SMART goal system to get engaged. Research the laws in your state and community. If they are discriminatory, contact your lawmakers. You don’t have to organize a march on your state legislature (unless that’s your jam, in which case, rock on!). Email or phone your legislators and share your thoughts. Every email and phone call is logged by staffers so even if your particular legislator doesn’t agree with you, your voice is counted.

You can help an LGBTQ+ organization financially. Make a donation to your local centers or find a national one to contribute to. Facebook makes it super easy to set up a fundraiser during your birthday month and you can choose whatever non-profit you want. I have mine going right now raising funds for the Transgender Resource Center of New Mexico. Even if you don’t have cash to spare, think about donating clothes, blankets, toiletries, etc. Most organizations have wish lists.

Join a support group in your community. Many employers even have support groups already set up. My hubby joined the Sandia National Laboratories Parents of Nonbinary and Trans Kids Peer Support Group and attends the monthly zoom meetings. He says that he gets a lot out of them. Not a group available in your area? Start one. Contact parents of your kids’ friends and meet for coffee to discuss issues. The organization GLSEN can help. 

Read. Every week new Rainbow kids’ books are published. Check them out of the library. Not in your local library? Request them through interlibrary loan or ask your library to purchase them. If your kids’ schools are amenable, try getting them purchased for the school library. You could even donate some if you’re financially able. Need help finding books? Try mutuallyinclusivebooks.com. The incredible Devyn Douvier publishes a weekly new picture book release blog that includes several LGBTQ+ books. Mombian also has a great database of LGBTQ+ family books.

These are just a few of the ways to get engaged. There are so many more. We don’t each have to do everything and we don’t each have to be perfect (you’ll notice this blog is being published after the 15th). We just have to begin. So, I challenge you, my followers, to make a SMART, not-a-resolution, goal and get in the game. Together, we can have a huge impact on 2023.

2022 Holiday Gift Guide

As the holidays rapidly approach, there’s always that search for the perfect present for the kids in your life. May I suggest books? There’s no worrying about sizes, they last a long time, are easy to ship, and are non-fattening.

I recently found a terrific LGBTQ+ kids’ book gift guide on Mombian.com, and I’d like to share a sample of it with you. For the full guide, please click here. Story subjects include pronouns, biographies, families, relationships, communities, gender identity and expression, STEM, and bedtime.

The Pronoun Book, by Chris Ayala-Kronos, illustrated by Melita Tirado (Clarion). This bright board book highlights different pronouns and some of the diverse people who use each one. Simple but joyous.

If You’re a Kid Like Gavin: The True Story of a Young Trans Activist, by Gavin Grimm and Kyle Lukoff, illustrated by J Yang (Katherine Tegen Books). The tale of transgender teen Grimm’s choices and resilience before and during his successful federal court fight for the right to use the boy’s bathroom at school.

Some Daddies, Carol Gordon Ekster, Javiera Maclean Alvarez (Beaming Books). All daddies are different, but all are special, affirms this book about many different types of dads.

Cinderelliot: A Scrumptious Fairytale, by Mark Ceilley and Rachel Smoka-Richardson, illustrated by Stephanie Laberis (Running Press). A tasty riff on the classic story, about a young baker, his fairy godfather, and a prince looking for love.

True You: A Gender Journey, by Gwen Agna and Shelley Rotner (Clarion). A celebratory book filled with photos and testimonials of real children across a variety of gender identities and expressions.

Kapaemahu, by Hinaleimoana Wong-Kalu, Dean Hamer, and Joe Wilson, illustrated by Daniel Sousa (Kokila). An indigenous legend about four individuals of dual male and female spirit who brought healing arts from Tahiti to Hawaii.

Something Great, by Jeanette Bradley (Levine Querido). Quinn has created Something Great in their workshop. It might look like a plastic milk bottle on a string, but Quinn and a new friend find that it can swing, spin, lift, and more. When asked what it is “supposed” to be, nonbinary Quinn rejects labels, asserting, “It was just . . . itself. Something Great.”

Wishing all my followers a joyous and healthy holiday season. See you in 2023!

Kind Like Marsha

Kind. Inventive. Determined. Inclusive. Creative. These are just some of the adjectives used in Kind Like Marsha: Learning From LGBTQ+ Leaders written by Sarah Prager and illustrated by Cheryl “Ras” Thuesday. This brand-new picture book leads the reader on a journey exploring fourteen diverse, global, queer leaders throughout history.

Prager has chosen one affirmative adjective to represent each of the fourteen; along with a micro-biography and a quote from that person. The reader is urged that they, too, can be like this person:

• Kind like Marsha P. Johnson
• Inclusive like Harvey Milk
• Creative like Leonardo Da Vinci
• Smart like Lynn Conway

Each queer leader is accompanied by one of Thuesday’s Caribbean/Asian influenced illustrations. Their vibrancy captures the reader’s imagination and echoes Prager’s text descriptions, including visual hints to each person’s lifework.

“Avoiding any discussion of violence against LGBTQ+ communities and the resulting trauma, this collective biography is a helpful starting point for children who would benefit from a gentler entry point into sensitive histories. Older readers may find this survey too simple to be engaging, but caregivers, educators, and librarians can use it to prime younger children for eventual deeper dives into the lives and struggles of LGBTQ+ icons.” (Kirkus reviews)

Kind Like Marsha is a beautiful addition to our ever-expanding treasury of queer picture books. A must-have for all families, queer and otherwise.

Stitch by Stitch

“Piece by piece. Stitch by stitch. That’s how a quilt is made.”

Thus opens Stitch by Stitch: Cleve Jones and the AIDS Memorial Quilt by Rob Sanders, illustrated by Jamey Christoph, and published by Magination Press. This is both a picture book biography of Cleve Jones, and an explanation of the birth and evolution of the AIDS Memorial Quilt.

The word quilt evokes a feeling of comfort and being loved. For much of history, quilts were made by hand and took a long time to put together. You wouldn’t put that much energy into something for someone you didn’t care about deeply. Cleve Jones’ great-grandmother lovingly sewed a quilt for him before he was born (Oct. 11, 1954).

As a young, gay man, Cleve moved to San Francisco, and ended up working as a student intern for Harvey Milk. After Harvey’s assassination in 1978, he became a gay activist. When the AIDS crisis began in the 1980s, Cleve co-founded the San Francisco AIDS Foundation to help. It was Cleve’s idea to create fabric quilt panels to memorialize friends who had died from AIDS. Cleve and his friend, Joseph Durant, made the first two panels. Gert McMullin sewed the panels together. More and more panels were made by families and friends commemorating their loved ones lost to AIDS. In 1987, on Cleve’s birthday, all the panels were displayed on the grass of the National Mall in Washington, D.C. The ground was covered. The names were all read aloud.

The text of this book is both verses of a poem and sentences of prose. Rob’s gentle poem guides the reader through Cleve’s life and the process of the AIDS Memorial Quilt being made. Difficult subjects, like Harvey Milk’s assassination and the AIDS epidemic are thoughtfully explained in age-appropriate vocabulary. Jamey Christoph’s illustrations have a softness to them that imitates the warmth of a cherished quilt. There are several pages of backmatter to encourage further study on Cleve and the AIDS Quilt.

“Its story is beautifully captured in the book’s smooth pacing and brief paragraphs. Readers will follow its journey from that march as it becomes both a monument to mourning and a means of changing the stigma surrounding HIV and AIDS. The weighty backmatter, which includes discussion points, a glossary, timeline, biographies, and brief bibliography, will help educators and caregivers guide further learning. The racial diversity on display throughout the book is admirable.” (Kirkus Reviews)

Reading this book is like wrapping yourself in a beloved, old quilt. I highly recommend adding it to your rainbow book collection.

(For a YouTube video of Rob Sanders reading Stitch by Stitch aloud, click here.)